Do your friends or family pressure you into making decisions right away, before you’ve had a chance to think? Do you sometimes say yes before you understand what that means?
If you’re a sucker for someone else’s emergency – or you just can’t say no to that sort of pushy friend – you’re not alone. It’s happened to all of us at one time or another.
Manipulators know exactly how to push your buttons. And once you’re caught up in emotion, rational thought goes out the window. That’s how the brain works. And that’s good – if you’re running from danger or pulling a child out of a burning building. All of your energy goes to your muscles so that you or that child can live to see another day.
But when someone’s trying to talk you into something, it’s important to think clearly. And you can’t do that while you’re caught up in emotion. That’s why you need time. Once you get away from the pressure, you’re able to think clearly again. You remember what happened the last time you gave in to this person – and that you promised yourself, “Never again!” You see that this isn’t your responsibility – and you’re tired of being expected to take care of it. Or you think about the fact that you’d be giving up the only weeknight you have left – and that’s not OK.
If you don’t put some distance between yourself and the pressure, you won’t think about all that other stuff until it’s too late. And that’s exactly what some people want. The people who care about you will understand if you need to take some time to think. As for the rest … do you really want to keep making them happy at your own expense?